Quote of the Day: Robert Frost
“Something we were withholding made us weak,
until we found it was ourselves.”
Too often it’s not the things beyond our control that hold us back but our fears and inhibitions; we can be our own worst enemies. Since I’m an introvert, this is definitely something I struggle with. I’m slowly learning to not hold myself back and to step out of my comfort zone. It can be tough, but I have found that it’s always rewarding!
Do you ever feel like you hold yourself back?
Filed under Quote | Comments (24)
Ultimately, it’s ONLY me who holds myself back from tackling challenges. That fear of failure somehow sneaks in, but I have to say, it gets better with age. It’s been a constant pattern in my life to be worried about others’ approval, but I can honestly say that I no longer carry that burden.
From the sound of the last couple of podcasts, you don’t sound much like an introvert!
to daisy's comment
Letting go of the need for approval is hard. Good for you!
to Robin Follette's comment
I agree, I have struggled with the need for approval for most of my life and I’ve finally started to let go of that-so freeing!
to angie h's comment
I read this on January 10. It was the nudge l I needed.
“That year, writing up my resolutions while watching my one-year-old get frustrated to tears by a Christmas toy a little too advanced for him, crawl away, then try again, I suddenly got it: Wow, I thought, I’m acting like an infant about my life goals. Which means that either I’m not ready to reach for my dreams or I’m seriously letting myself down.” Lisa Stone, Co-founder of BlogHer
Frost’s quote is a nice, gentle reminder. Great message!
to Robin's comment
I find it amazing that you are introverted, you are such an incredibly driven person and I just assume that being outgoing and unafraid of attention goes hand in hand with that.
to Brenda's comment
It’s a constant battle with myself to get out for social events. Then I’m exhausted for a day afterwards. That’s one thing I like about blogging, it’s a great way for an introvert to be a little more social without being too overwhelmed.
to Susy's comment
i van’t believe it! I have a dear friend who is very much an extrovert… I always though it was the dimples, so go for it! :-)
You have so much to teach other by just sharing what you do.
I loved the property tour, and look forward to seeing what you do in the years to come.
to Marina C's comment
A question: was the photo taken in your mother’s garden? Is the lovely green house a kit, or did you parents build it?
Please tell how she uses it in Ohio, about the same as our NH spot, zone 5b.
Thanks!
to Marina C's comment
Yes, it is my mother’s garden. Her greenhouse is a sunshed, here’s a post about us building it: /2010/10/23/my-moms-new-greenhouse/
to Susy's comment
Thank you!
to Marina C's comment
I”m a hermit in my comfort zone.
to Maybelline's comment
All the time. But one thing about these kid things: They force me out of my comfort zone (which is quiet, calm, orderly and basically everything children are not) on a daily basis. Which is a good thing, though exhausting.
to kristin @ going country's comment
I agree that we improve with age if that is something that you work on. When I was much younger I held myself back so much, I often lost sight of myself… I learned to not do that in my late 20s & then went to work for Boeing where we had to use personality & relating testing & learning to get our raises.. Well, I love those just for fun.. to get raises by learning about my own personality and how I relate to others & how to improve that was just icing on the cake.
Being an introvert doesnt mean you dont have any social graces or arent friendly. I’m very friendly and quite open (to a degree) but Im definitely an introvert & like you Susie, after a day filled with people, I need to come home & be alone to restore my energy.
What truly defines an introvert & extrovert is where & how they get their energy. Extroverts gain energy by being with other people and high energy environments. Introverts gain energy by being alone & in calm, serene environments.
I still hold myself back sometimes, but much much less than I did when I was young.. I guess I feel like Im at the age that its now or never. ;)
to KimH's comment
Yes, I should do a podcast about introverts and HSP.
to Susy's comment
You really should, Susy! Until you talked about HSP I had no idea that it was real. I’m sure I’m not alone in that. I definitely think people would benefit from a topic like that!
to Beth K's comment
Jumping in with an third “do it”!! :)
I hate how many days it sometimes takes me to recup from big events or just an outing with a lot of people.
to Misti's comment
Is this really you?!! As I had pictured a very grown up person…haha say 50 ish…..as you have so many interests and a matured personality…I am amazed!! 150 acres you are amazing! I am introverted too…and feeling and intuitive! INFJ..At my age i dont care what anyone thinks I have to be me all me…for better or worse….take it or leave it…
to sharon's comment
Yep this is me, I’ve packed a lot of living and varied experiences into my 36 years of life.
to Susy's comment
Great photo Susy!
to MountainMisty's comment
…I can be my own best friend or my own worst enemy. It seems with age I’ve learned to let go of a lot of things but I will forever be learning. And I can relate with being an introvert, that is me thru and thru. For instance, today I attended an baby shower. It was fun and I enjoyed myself but to be perfectly honest I was never happier than to come home. I think as soon as I walked in the back door, I let out a great big sigh. Now time to recharge. :o)
…Lovely photo of you Miss Susy – cute dimples! :o)
…Blessings
to tj's comment
I often struggle with the same thing. I have come a long ways over the years through my job, but even though I am better at it, I don’t necessarily like it. Like you, I totally need the down time at home away from people to recharge.
I actually got lectured recently because I don’t speak up enough in a committee I am a part of at work. It is upsetting because I have tried to speak up when I had something to contribute, but apparently it isn’t viewed as being enough. It is frustrating to feel like you’re not good enough when you really are trying hard. People who aren’t introverts don’t understand how much effort it takes for me to speak up. The fear and stress are almost paralyzing at times. I just wish they could be a little more understanding sometimes.
Overall, though, I am thankful that since college I’ve been forced to step out of my comfort zone a bit. It’s been good for me and I’ve met many wonderful people because of it.
to Beth K's comment
I’m an introvert as well, and I always struggle with taking chances, but the end result is usually worth it. People are also surprised I’m an introvert because I’ve lived all over the country and do things pretty interdependently, but they just don’t know how scared I’ve been half the time, haha! I’ve found it so easy to get into a rut because big changes can be scary, but like the saying goes, you don’t typically regret the things you do but rather the things you don’t do…
to S's comment
Introverts ‘r’ Us. Our entire family is–with the extra added bonus of procrastination. But not because we are lazy per se, but fearful of the “what could happen if….” Usually with the unpleasant things especially. Baby steps, though. We will get better….when i think about it, i get the same feeling i do when i plant a seed in the ground. There is hope…and that is optimistic. And that can be just what spurs the change to be a little more brave and confident in our differences from the “mainstream”.
to whit's comment
I do still struggle with holding myself back, however, I really have learned to push through many of my fears. My mom was instrumental in this, I think she recognized I was getting in my own way in highschool. I was so shy, I even hated ordering my food at a restaurant. I remember clear as day, that I was as nervous for the first day of 10th grade as I was for 1st grade. She made me get my first job which was a hostess at a restaurant where she worked. Not only did I have to talk to people, talk to strangers *gasp*, but I had to call peoples’ names over the loud speaker, deal with cranky customers who got annoyed by the wait, and it was very busy place so it was all under pressure, too. I did great and I love to talk to people now, especially strangers. It really was a pivotal part of growing up for me!
Graduate school was huge in breaking me out of my shell. It was part of my advisor’s pedagogy to push you outside your comfort zone. He also helped me get over the need for approval. His attagirls were few and far between, but they really meant something when he said them. I really love that saying that goes something like this, “as soon as you step out of your comfort zone, your comfort zone gets that much bigger”.
to angie h's comment